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Elaine Chan's blog. Not entirely frivolous :) And I'll try to be honest. Friends Ng Emily Georgie Hannah Gayle Josh Pork Nad Joy Robs Sonya Shirin Char Nat Robert Naddi Ethel Yan Eliz Reads The Rebelution Radical Womanhood Reformed Perspective Bite-sized Current Affairs (dumbed down!) New York Magazine Online Catty Guilty Pleasure -.- Let's hear it |
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
I really ought to go to bed soon but some thoughts first...
Last night I was annoyed yet again with recent sufferer of H1N1 (Sorry for euphemisms but this is after all a public blog). Was sharing with the girls on Saturday that insincerity and disloyalty are my pet peeves. Like it gets to me EVERYTIME. I can outdo a sailor if I so much as feel slighted by someone I deemed important or once important. But I also shared about forgiveness. The parallels between Christ's death, Stephen's martyrdom and Saul's eventual conversion. The grace that once experienced, doesn't recede, but overflows. I felt so ready to forgive; so ready to be liberated completely. Then the conversation happened. It wasn't terrible but I was rolling my eyes and being bitchy. So have I really forgiven? The sting's gone but does forgiving mean that I tolerate every inane and self-absorbed conversation we have without combusting(so few I can count them on my one hand). What I think now is that it's a state of being. Less on the inevitably uncomfortable small talks; more on the belief that there is a renewed perception of the other. Less focus on how I may/may not have forgiven; more on how it's been a blessed release for both of us. The day I stop questioning if I have reached that state of being is gonna be an Alleluia day! USA in 3 days. Goodnight world. |